Fostering...

Fostering has never been something I've seriously considered for our family. If I did think about it then I thought it might be something we could do when our own kids (adopted ones included) are older so that they would be able to understand the temporary - ness (I know it's not a word) of fostering. In particular for our situation I didn't think a family from another culture should really foster a child unless that child is expected to be adopted to that different culture. Just the thought of a child having to adjust to eating western food, speaking english and all the other western culture specific things in our family and then having to readjust all over again if they are adopted locally seemed unfair to the child. I still have these concerns... especially the first one for our own kids. But in January when we received an email from a friend in Manila asking for someone to temporarily take in a 1 month old baby girl in need of a home, well we didn't really hesitate that much. Actually I think I cried for a few minutes (I'll blame that on the pregnancy hormones), prayed a few minutes, then called Daniel, called my mum and then wrote back saying we could do it. That is how our journey with E.R. began, and I'll say now that I have no idea where it will lead, if anywhere. She was born in December to a mother who had sold her first child and was planning to do the same again. Thankfully her mother had contact with Gentle Hands (http://gentlehandsinc.org/) and was convinced to give her daughter to them instead. It seems that it's not an unusual case for Gentle Hands. However what was unusual in E.R.'s case is that her two aunts are the ones caring for the babies at Gentle Hands. Obviously there would be a huge conflict of interest if she would be put in the nursery, in fact the aunts wanted nothing to do with her. So E.R. was in need for a foster family to care for her until she could be adopted by a local family. Our initial thoughts were that we could take her right away, probably for 2-3 months before our own baby was born. We had no clue that actually getting a foster licence requires almost as much paperwork as our adoption application. And because of Daniel's travel schedule conflicting with the opening hours of government offices it actually took us over 2 months just to get our application done. And then we put things on hold while we had Ellyana and adjusted to life as a family of four. So much has gone through our minds during this time. What on earth are we thinking?! Just given birth to our own child and taking on someone else's at the same time. Everything we had originally thought went out the window as we realised that nothing moves fast in this country, especially not paperwork. It could take 6 months to a year (or even more) for E.R. to be adopted, so we have to be prepared to have her with us for as long as it takes. When we looked at all the practicalities of taking E.R. it seemed clear that it wasn't such a 'wise' decision. Daniel travels often for work which means I'd be home alone at night with 3 little ones even though we have a helper during the day. We are already squished into our little apartment so just finding the space for another baby will be a challenge. And we have travel plans, a holiday in Subic with our good friends in July and Daniel's brother's wedding in Macau in September. But somehow all the practicalities don't seem to matter so much when we think about giving a home (even a temporary one) to a baby who has none. I don't think I could feel at peace with myself if I said no simply because it would make my life too complicated. If the one time I have the chance to live out James 1:27 I decide not to disrupt my travel plans. And so, the outcome of all this is still unknown, it could be that God actually has another plan for E.R.  But Daniel and I have let Gentle Hands know that we are ready to take her whenever they need.